I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
