I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
