I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize