i just wanna soil my oats bro
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
