Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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