i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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