Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
