Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
