I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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