he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
