So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
