i would punch a child for taco bell
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
