My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
