I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
