when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I will be naked everywhere
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Randomize
