dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
