Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize