...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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