Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
