It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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