Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Randomize
