We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize