he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i think i have herpe
just one?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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