So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
