Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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