hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
