You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
