just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
