people are starting to question the shark bite story
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
