dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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