I'm lost and stupid without you.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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