guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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