The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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