Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
