no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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