So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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