all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize