In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
