I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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