you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
