i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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