Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i wish my penis had a tongue
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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