it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
