I think I just saw someone hide a body.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
My pussy is not your playground.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
