Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
