Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
