i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
