Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
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