You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
