Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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