You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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